So many questions, so few answers...

Every once in a while, you come across a person who touches your heart in a way that few can. I have been lucky enough to regularly come across such people. These people have, without actually trying, inspired me, taught me some of the most important things in life, and made me see myself differently. God surely seems to like me a lot, because yet again, I have the privilege of getting to know someone truly special. And she is special in absolutely every sense of the word.

I remember, it had taken me all of three minutes to form my first impression of her. I thought she was simple, intelligent, warm, humble, sweet, funny and most of all, quite enigmatic. (For the skeptics, yes, I can think at least that much in 3 minutes) Now, seven months later, I can add another thousand adjectives to those, but the core impression remains exactly the same.

The first thing you notice when you see her is her million-watt smile. These days, I'm on a 'No problem is too big' trip. And believe it or not, the root of this lies in that smile of hers. The world seems to make perfect sense when she is smiling. So if you have spent all your money, been dumped by your girlfriend, flunked in Applied Mechanics, and been kicked out of your house since you are about as useful as a sack of infertile soil, maybe you should see her smile once. You may actually spot a silver lining somewhere in that dark cloud of yours. And perhaps the best thing about her smile is the fact that it is so infectious. I think I have smiled more in the last 7 months than I have in my entire life before that. Sometimes, I'm even smiling to myself, just for the heck of it! But then a lot of people think I'm a bit off my rocker anyway...

Then, you have got to hear her speak. Every single word, no matter which language she speaks in, is pronounced in the most perfect way possible. English has never sounded better to me. A phrase as mundane as 'Good Afternoon' sounds like poetry when it comes from her. And I get the distinct impression that God has appointed a dedicated angel just to regulate the speed and volume of her speech. They are as perfect as Roger Federer's impeccable forehand.

So, I have just mentioned the two worst things about her. :-) Time for the good part!

Her attitude towards life, people, and her work are so nice, so warm, so genuine, and so simple, that it can be likened to the first ever 'Happy Anniversary' card made by a child for his parents. Every time you talk to her, you are amazed at how much sense she makes in her most perspicuous statements. The one that comes straight to my mind is “Why be a Gloomy Cloud?”. I think one can live a life around those words. She has the most wonderful ability of being able to look at herself objectively, and of even laughing at herself. Her earthy sense of humour, and her almost child-like demeanour, though wonderful, are merely part of a natural facade that is as delicate as light cotton wool, and which masks her innate strength and maturity. And perhaps these are the qualities that I like the most in her. Her strength and her maturity are staggering in magnitude and over-whelming in nature. She herself would probably ask me, “Where in heaven can you see this strength and maturity?”. My reply to that would be that, at least to me, they are in plain sight, as clear as daylight. Her personality, her attitude, her sheer presence, all give rise to a million questions, the answers to which are worth waiting a lifetime for.

Her presence has benefited me in ways that I can't even begin to explain. I have always loved the people I love to death, and I have always felt that I could never love them more. (I could definitely show my love more, but that is another story...) Somehow though, ever since I have known her, I get the feeling that I love the people I love just a wee bit more than I did earlier! I also think I have begun looking at myself differently these days. Not that I've begun liking myself much, but I think I've begun understanding why I'm not exactly my favourite person! :-) Another thing I have learnt from her is what else one can do with a toothpick, but that is a story that deserves a blog post of its own!

I could go on and on, but I guess the bottom line is that I feel absolutely honoured, privileged, and lucky that I can call someone like her my friend. Knowing how great God is, I am absolutely sure, (and she'll be the first one to agree,) that there are many more people like her out there in the world. My only wish is that every single person in the world should know at least one of those people...

Movie Review: Jodhaa Akbar

“Hrithik Roshan playing Akbar?” was my first thought when Ashutosh Gowariker first announced his ambitious magnum opus Jodhaa Akbar. Now, nearly 4 years later, I gladly eat my words, because Hrithik Roshan as Jalal-ud-din Mohammed Akbar is one of the reasons that Gowariker’s fifth film, quite like his third and fourth, becomes the unforgettable cinematic experience that it is.

But Hrithik is just a cog in the massive machine that Gowariker’s masterful vision has assembled. It is an epic which is, at its core, a beautiful love story between not just a Mughal emperor and a Rajput princess, but a man and a woman. The film is well written, brilliantly shot and masterfully directed. Be it the impressive battle scenes or the ones depicting the sessions in the famous Diwan-i-Aam, each scene in this film is unforgettable, with the true classics being the interactions between Akbar and Jodhaa, as, slowly, one step at a time, Akbar is made to earn Jodhaa’s love and respect, which any man should have to do. The sword fight between Akbar and Jodhaa will, for me, go down as one of the best scenes ever in a Hindi film.

As mentioned earlier, the writing of this movie is top-notch, with the tight screenplay of the film supporting a story of inherently epic proportions. In particular, I would like to take my hat off to the idea that Akbar’s famous habit of moving amongst his people incognito had its root in a lesson that he learnt from Jodhaa. Also unique is the fact that for a change, amongst all of Akbar’s Navratnas, it is Todarmal who takes centre-stage in this story, as opposed to one of my all-time favourite historical characters, Birbal, who isn’t even mentioned in passing!

Technically, this film is nearly flawless. The cinematography is breath-taking and the production design is the absolute best. The editing is good, but the film should be trimmed a bit. The length is not really in issue, but certain portions in the movie are unnecessary. Special mention must be made of the songs Azeem-o-shaan Shahenshah and Khwaja Mere Khwaja. Their picturization adds an extra punch to A. R. Rahman’s compositions.

The performances in the movie are outstanding, with Hrithik Roshan bringing Akbar’s character to life. His posture, his expressions and his dialogue delivery are absolutely amazing. They say behind every successful man is a woman. I’d like to change that a bit to “With every successful man is a woman.” And in Akbar’s case, what a woman! The character of Jodhaa Bai is one of the best female leads in a movie in recent years. And Aishwariya Rai’s performance enhances it greatly. She has rarely expressed so well before, and proves that in the hands of a good director, she can truly do wonders. Also, she looks better in this film than ever before. The supporting cast in this movie has done a good job.

As a story teller, Ahutosh Gowariker impresses like never before. After watching Swades and Lagaan, I couldn’t help wishing that I had had a chance to tell those amazing stories in my own way. After this film though, all I could think was that I could never have told this story in this way. Jodhaa Akbar takes Gowariker one step further along the path to a special place in the annals of Indian film history.

So, for me, its 5 on 7 for Ashutosh Gowariker’s Jodhaa Akbar. Commercially, this film has the potential to take the ticket windows by storm. However, knowing how people tend to crib about long movies, I wouldn’t really want to predict the box-office fate of this film. But still, Jodhaa Akbar is truly a brilliant cinematic accomplishment by a fine film-maker. Whether this movie is fact or fiction is really of no consequence at all, because it is films like this that truly make cinema such a wonderful experience.

"Is death really so bad"

The Film:

The film starts off with Praj's accident, which leads to her death. She then awaits her meeting with her Creator. Her shock on realizing God's gender quickly changes into anger at being 'taken away' so early. She questions God on this. In the simplest of words, God tells her that life and death are pre-ordained. Praj seems mature enough to understand this. She then wants to know how she did in her life. Again, God makes her see that it really is what you think about yourself that truly matters, rather than what someone else thinks of you. Soon, you realize that just being in God's presence is so comforting, that Praj even goes on to take a few liberties with Her, hinting about the general notion people have about the masculinity of the Almighty. But then, God being God, knows about this, and jokes about it as well. And just when you think that the sun has set on Praj's life, you get to know that it is actually only the beginning of a long wait for Praj...

The Review:

I have always prided myself on being able to look at myself objectively, and it seems only logical to me that I review my own film the way I would any other. I hope to be completely objective, but I guess since I am the only person who knows what went into the making of this film, that might not be completely possible. So here goes…

We have all watched and criticized self-indulgent pieces of cinema like Sanjay Leela Bhansali’s ‘Devdas’, and more recently Anurag Kashyap’s ‘No Smoking’. However, very rarely will you come across 2 minutes of utter nonsense, packed with more self-indulgence and self-styled ‘tributes’ than Pradeep Menon’s “Is death really so bad?”

The first thought that passed through my mind after watched this was, “What the f@#$ was the director thinking? And who does he think he is anyway?”

While it must be said that the concept and more specifically, the idea that God is a Woman are quite original, one can’t help but wonder if there isn’t an easier, less abstract way of conveying simple ideas like the fact that we ought to bow before destiny or that God is a woman. Apart from the fact that the narrative is highly complex, with the viewer expected to understand philosophies of life from some seven-and-a-half words said by God, Pradeep has gone about trying to pay tributes to film-makers ranging from Quentin Tarantino and Alfred Hitchcock to Akira Kurosawa and even Satyajit Ray. Somebody ought to explain to Pradeep that liking these masters of cinema does not mean one can make movies like them. Even attempting to explain how he has tried would be an insult to these great names. Pradeep seems to have a particular liking for Tarantino, with no fewer than three different so-called tributes to him. One small example would be the subtext ‘9 minutes and 37 seconds later…’ which appears during this film. This has been picked straight out of Tarantino’s cult classic ‘Pulp Fiction’.

The screenplay of this movie seems to have been written with the right intent, but the execution is way below the mark. The performances by the lead actors are perfunctory. The blame for this lies, again, with the director. Deepti Patki as Praj expresses well, but one can spot her beginning to smile at a point where she should actually be livid, depressed and shocked, all at the same time. This is not a failure of the actor, but of the director. Something like this should never have even made it to the final cut of the film. Meghna Menon as God barely gets a few seconds of screen time, and so doesn’t get much scope. The cinematography is passable in general, and is actually good in a few places, considering that it is all hand-held. A few shots are unsteady though, and when you combine that with the terrible picture quality, the overall viewing experience that you get is pretty bad. The voice-over is terrible, and when you come to know later that that has also been done by Pradeep, you are pretty much ready to murder him.

There are some saving graces though. The editing of this movie is above average, and when you take this in context with the footage that was actually available to edit, you realize that Pradeep does seem to have a sound grasp of the aspects of editing a motion picture. The background music of the film is decent, with Pradeep coming up with a couple of original and hummable tunes. Harshil Adesara has played the tunes well.

So that is half out of 7 for Pradeep Menon’s first directorial offering, “Is death really so bad?” It is a film that may have been made with the right intent, but fails to make an impact on anyone viewing the film, simply because you barely understand the film in the first place. Add to that the poor direction, terrible picture quality and mind-numbing voice-over, and what you get may actually qualify as a medical marvel. Start playing this in front of someone who is sitting on the pot, battling constipation, and tell him that the film is going to play in an endless loop. The poor fellow will be out of the toilet in no time!

It turned out to be little more scathing than I thought it would be. I guess, for me, a bad film is a bad film, irrespective of any other factors. My head agrees with the review, but my heart doesn’t. 20 years down the line, a remake of this film is in the offing. And then, it will be shot at Marine Drive, Mumbai…

20 important things I have learnt till date

The learnings given below are all things that I have observed in the 21 (almost 22) years of my life. Most of them are not relevant to one another, and have been arranged in increasing order of the significance these learnings have in my life. I would be glad to indulge in a discussion regarding the reasons behind me arriving at each of the following 20 conclusions, and I would love it if people could tell my why one, some or all of these learnings are actually utter nonsense.

20 important things I have learnt till date

19. Everyone should have a best friend

18. Even if money is the last thing that matters to you, you cannot survive without it

17. It is very easy to portray an image of yourself that is completely opposite to the real You

16. It is possible for a person to be smarter at the age of 5 than at the age of 21

15. There is a certain amount of good in every single human being

14. There is absolutely no limit to the love you can feel for a person

13. There really is no substitute for hard work, but if you discount luck, then you will eventually face a shock

12. It is possible to fall truly in love at the age of 5

11. Mumbai is the greatest city in the world

10. If you really decide it, then it is possible to be happy, no matter what problems you have in life

9. Every human being should have at least one hobby which he/she is completely passionate about

8. Women are far superior to men

7. Still, no man would want to trade places with a woman

6. Everyone should have a sibling

5. God exists, and He won’t be angry that this learning is not Number 1.

4. It is nearly impossible to get over your first true love

3. And yet, it is possible to fall in love a second time.

2. It is possible to know, in just one instant, that you want to spend your entire life with a particular person

1. My parents are the best people in the world

0. You are always learning, every single day of your life.